Sunday, March 31, 2013
For Friends Long Gone
One of the hardest lessons you learn as an instructor is that your students will move on. No matter how much effort you put into their training, either within one year or after decades. Rarely does anyone talk about this, but this is the reality. One day the student is no longer there and most likely never seen again.
You are offering them the chance to experience your art and learn it. And they have and then they move on.
You have to realize you have done your job, they have learned from you and made the decision to move on. For our core lesson is to make one’s own decisions. This might be outside of their control such as moving for work. Or they may have interests that are more important to them.
You do not develop the student’s interest in the art, you but enhance it. You don’t create a life time of study for the individual, you just allow them to participate. You can’t create an instructor, you can only provide the environment for them t develop the interest in their studies and grow into the role.
You do this by allowing the student see you make continual choices for your art, and inspire them to do the same. When the time comes that they eventually choose to move on you celebrate that they have learned to do so. They learned from you how to choose what is appropriate for themselves.
That this is hard for you is not to be considered. When you choose to share your studies this comes with the territory. They have chosen a path to themselves that does not include continuing with you..
Perhaps they will continue to train, Perhaps they will not. Each person follows their own heart.
Most of the time, they will not tell you their intention. They will just not come back. In fact, they may well go out of their way to not meet with you again.
You wish them well, for they have to follow their heart. You will miss their presence and the time you spent with them. Each of them have been a lesson for you to learn.
Thank you for the time we spent together.